When Having a Slumber Party...... DON'T Invite the Cat!

Last night the girls and I decided to have a little impromptu slumber party in Toni's and Nia's bedroom. This consisted of dragging down 3 mattresses, blankets, pillows, and then arguing for a half hour over who was sleeping with mommy.

My girls love me so! :)

After spending what felt like 2 long hours of getting all the girls and myself settled in, after feeding my addiction to Facebook, and 3 sets of teethbrushing, and making sure everyone went to the bathroom after consuming a cup of water (what's the point?), and changing pajama attire a few times....

YES, this was getting VERY complicated!

We were all finally in bed and snuggled together under the beam of a softly lit flashlight.

I got the girls entertained in what turned out to be a quick game of shadow hand puppets before it turned into a bedtime form of American Idol in the darkness of the bedroom.

Of course, Nia had to be first and she serenaded us with a 4-part series of songs that actually looked as if it was an act out of a Shakespearian play. The girls is definitely not shy under the glares of a spotlight/flashlight shining in her eyes. She belted out those songs so loud that I thought she would awaken her brother who was asleep at his friends house 5 blocks down the road!

"I am holding my heart right now and it's gonna help me cook...

and God is gonna give me some onions....

and I'm gonna make dinner for the cat....

and I love you cause I'm gonna get a RockStar Makeover for Christmas....

and CAA-CAA, CAA-CAA....."

I have NO clue what the CAA-CAA was all about!

I am convinced she is going to be an actress, or some form of "unique" entertainer in her adult life.

Toni got up next and her style is a cross between Hannah Montana and a crazy woman! She's even louder; she woke up both her brother and a few people in Pensacola in the process.

She sang about living in Texas which has me a bit confused as well since she has never even been to Texas. But she is convinced she is a cowgirl with a horse, and raising cows for a living and selling wheat berries to make a living in her song. I think she has been watching me play Farmville on Facebook too much lately.

It takes Toni a few minutes to warm up to being the main attraction, but once she does, she actually finds her flow and that beautiful singing voice she was born with. In the end, she quits sounding like the dead cow she started out as and blossoms into an angel with a voice from heaven.

I don't think it helps that she is constantly critiqued by her older sister who can become very critical of Toni's efforts to be a creative spirit. Talk about being under a microscope!

Speaking of Nadia; she did nothing but direct the whole project and manage the flashlight. I, of course, was the over-exuberant audience to both my daughters budding talents. Just as a mom should be.

Sandman finally started visiting as the girls one by one, rubbed their eyes and fell asleep. Finally I could find my place, and my pillow, amongst the strewn tired bodies of little girls and find a sleep fairy of mine own.

About 4:30 in the morning I was abruptly awaken by Remi, our cat, meowing to go outside. I, obviously, ignored him because it was 4:30 in the morning and I was exhausted from all the nights entertainment festivities by the girls. Next thing I knew, that damn cat was scratching on my legs. I sat straight up stop him and what do you think I did?!

My hand landed in a big pile of cat poop!

That freaking cat had found MY sleeping spot and PURPOSELY crapped between MY legs on MY blanket just to get his point across that HE WANTED TO GO OUT NOW!

There I sat with Remi at my feet, cat poop in my hands, and me about to barf all over the girls in the process cause the smell of kitty ca-ca was quickly engulfing all those brain cells directly connected to my nose and my stomach.

I stumbled to my feet and managed to run to the bathroom without stepping on 3 sets of sleeping feet in the process. Remi of course just had to run after me and watch how I was gonna handle this disgusting early morning affair.

After depositing/slinging the cat crap into the toilet, I was feeling a little like Lucy in the Peanuts cartoons after being kissed by Snoopy:

"Where's the soap, where's the disinfectant!"

After scrubbing with extremely hot water (which further woke up the rest of the brain cells), and gobs of soap, I had the unfortunate duty of cleaning up the rest of mess left behind.

As I entered the bedroom again, the stench of cat poop permeated everything and once again I was feeling the need to heave in the direction of Nadia's curled up body. Remi was till behind me observing my every move I made in hopes that I would get the hint to let him out when he said so!

Carefully lifting the comforter and carrying it into the kitchen, I soon found myself doing laundry at 4:40 in the morning which I don't think I've done since one of the twins decided it was a good idea to barf everything they ate for the week in one single night. I had forgotten how much fun it was.

But on my way to the kitchen, there sat the stupid cat at the back door giving me that look as to say, "Well, are you gonna let me out now?"

I did and I made sure thank him for not using the cat box when it would have been a most appropriate time to do so instead of trying to make some stupid feline point about who really runs this house!

With the comforter loudly washing it's way back to cleanliness, I scarfed up the blanket on Julian's bed and wandered back into a still mildly smelly room with a bottle of Febreze in hand. After a few quick sprays, I finally settled back down between Nadia and Nia and stared out the window at the passing morning clouds and trees waving in the breeze until I finally drifted back off to sleep.

Of course when I awoke this morning and told the girls of the kitty "mishap", they were dying of hysterics that mom was woken up by a handful of kitty poop! You know it's gonna be that story that hits the school news come Monday morning when they go back.

I finally saw Remi this morning as he jumped over the fence after his morning stroll around our neighborhood. He walked right up to me with purrs and rubs and several meows as if to say: "I love you, but just don't ever ignore me in the middle of the night again, or next time..... it could be your head woman!"

Did You Know That Toilet Training Involves a Blender?

I was gonna write about how crappy my life has been of late, but who wants to hear that stuff when the holidays are just around the corner. No one wants to be the first Bah Humbug of the season. So instead, the powers of God sent me in the direction of Nia instead. It still amazes the power that a child can have over a situation.

Lately I have been having issues with Nia going to the bathroom when she needs to. You know the look; walking with her butt stuck out a mile while holding herself and stubbornly proclaiming "I don't HAVE to go!".

This has resulted in more accidents and excess laundry than I care to admit. So the other night I came up with a clever parenting technique; fabricate the situation to my favor in order to get the desired results. In other words:

I lied!

Nia was prancing around in the back yard the other day and there that butt went. Then she started dancing around while holding herself, and there was nothing Princess-cy about it!

"Nia, go to the bathroom.", I requested

"I don't HAVE to go!", she insists.

A few moments later after watching her do more squatting than dancing (it was quite weird looking at this point), I insisted again: "Nia, GO to the BATHROOM!".

"But I don't HAVE go!!", she yells back.

The whole back and forth thing is starting to get redundant and it's getting on my nerves at this point, so suddenly I have a clever idea of tricking the child into going.

"Nia, come here. I need to check you eyes a minute cause I can tell by your eyes if you have to go.", I say while glaring over my sunglasses.

She slowly walks towards me in that semi-duck position and I reach over and pull down her lower eyelid to her left eye.

"Yep, you gotta go Nia. The yellow spot in your eye is showing up and THAT means your bladder is full.", I barely squeak out without laughing in her face.

Not wanting to argue with medical science at that point, she promptly heads into the house and goes to the bathroom.

"Problem solved!", I say smiling to the hubs who is giving me that "Shame on you", look for lying to our daughter.

Well tonight, I was faced with the exact same challenge. Sitting outside and enjoying the mildly cool air while sipping my fav Pinot Nior, Nia comes outside and soon she has that butt stuck out again while drinking a glass of water and... holding herself.

Yes, it WAS a site! How she didn't pee all over herself while drinking the water is beyond me.

"Nia, go to the bathroom.", I half patiently say cause I'm like relaxing and I really don't want to go through this whole "go to the bathroom circus" again.

"But I don't HAVE to go.", she says while bouncing up and down the steps.

"Nia, your butt is stuck out and I KNOW you have to go!", I really insist this time.

Something in my voice suddenly makes her stop short then she slowly turns around to me and pulls down her eyelid and asks: "Is that yellow thing in my eye?".

Nearly busting out laughing I replied "Yes it is!".

As she opens the door to go into the house to the bathroom she turns to me and says:

"THAT means the blender is FULL!"

AT&T and iPhone - A Divorce That Needs to Happen NOW!

Dear AT & T,

(actually, there is NOTHING "Dear" with the way I feel about this letter),

Though I am totally in love with my iPhone and have been since they day it arrived on my birthday exactly 2 years ago, because of your consistent and unreliable service, it and I are about to part ways.

For months I have overlooked the voicemails that arrived sometimes 2 days after they were left. I grumbled in annoyance in the many calls that would be dropped 2 or 3 times before I could actually get through and talk to whomever I was calling. I even managed to grit my teeth through the many phone calls that seem to be coming in (especially from my daughter's friends and the hubs as he drove hours to get to and from work), but didn't get through because of your inept network capabilities since taking on the iPhone.

I tried re-booting, reseting my network, fixing the Wi-Fi (which is also unreliable at this writing), and troubleshooting everything. Nada! I had been pretty patient over the past fews months waiting for you to fix the issues on your side.

All that changed last night when I was faced with an emergency with my son. See, my son fell and hit his head so hard that he was left unconscious for nearly 5 minutes. He had a cell phone with him, which by the way, is NOT on an AT&T network, and I was called ten times but the calls never came through on YOUR network.

Since I've been accustomed to this aggravating issue of calls not getting through, I frequently have to check the phone to see if anyone has called. All this was happening during my trip to pick my daughter up from choir. Upon my arrival I checked to see if there were any calls first. There sat the ten calls that never got through to me in my son's time of emergency and need. I called home where the hubs promptly told me what had happened to my son.

Because of your lack of service to my iPhone, my son laid on the ground surrounded by his friends, a stranger who happened to be a nurse, but his mother could not be reached in order to be by his side and comfort him through an event which I know scared the 12 year old to death. It was his friend's grandfather that finally brought my son home to me. That's what your "innovative" company gave me yesterday evening.

When I got home, there sat my son, whom could not get in touch with me because of your crappy service, dazed and confused on my sofa and in a great deal of pain. After noticing his pupils were not dilating properly, he was promptly rushed to the ER where he underwent a battery of tests and was later diagnosed with a severe concussion.

I laugh in disgust at your commercials proclaiming reliable and accurate services more so than ever. Since Steve Jobs went to bed with you 2 years ago over the iPhone deal, it has been a marriage made in hell ever since. Your words of "constantly seeking out ways to improve its performance and reduce costs", is a BIG stinking crock in my book.

I never signed up with AT&T originally. Since you merged with CellularOne just over 2 years ago, my service has gone downhill and my bills have skyrocketed to where my last bill sat at $500 when I normally paid just over $80 when under CellularOne.

When iPhone was introduced, I blindly followed the masses to stay by your side because I'm a greater lover and believer in Apple's products and services. But since you were given sole ownership over carrier's rights with the iPhone, it has been nothing but misery since. I own one of the most expensive phone's in the world and I can't even make and receive phone calls with anything close to accuracy because of your "networking" abilities.

You claim on your website that your focus is on "Connecting people with their world, everywhere they live and work." You tell this same line to my son who was lying half paralyzed and in a concussion on a concrete ground needing his mother who could not be contacted.

"You Lie!". AT&T! Because of it, I am now turning to some other carrier who can at least get my phone calls through in case another emergency arises and my children need me in the process; like when they are sick at school and the nurse can make one phone call to me instead of 5! Hey, I hear Wal-Mart has super deals at $45 a month for unlimited calls and texting. That should make you sweat in you boots a bit. For once, I like Wal-Mart now! At least THEY didn't leave my son without his mother at his side in an emergency!

Please, don't go blaming Apple and my iPhone for my missed calls. The phone has been checked several times and it works just fine. The issue is your company and it's widely known inability to keep up with system(s) that run iPhone. I read not too long ago that you "blamed" iPhone users for all these inconsistencies because they wanted to use all the features that iPhone was built to do.

Bawhahahahaha!!

You are such a lame an incompetent company that it's only by the grace of the politicians that you paid off in Washington that you're still even a half-functioning company. Haven't you been historically the biggest donor to Congressional campaigns of any company? Maybe if you would take some of that money and upgrade your services, you might not have to complain that you don't have the funds available to handle iPhone users demands.

If my son had died on that concrete, would that have been enough for you to find the money so that people COULD contact one another in an emergency even if they had to use their iPhone to do it?

Until Steve Jobs and Apple end the exclusive carrier contract with AT&T, my iPhone is going to be used just for iTunes and Apps, and a more reliable, less expensive company will be my phone service of choice. Hell, Magic Jack would be better at this point than using the "services" of AT&T!

I would say "Shame on you AT&T", but in the long run, I realistic know that you neither care about this situation nor any other's, just as long as you can squeeze every last available cent out of a customer like Mr. Krabs from SpongeBob Squarepants. Problem is, Mr. Krabs has far more integrity and honesty in just one of his claws than your whole company does.

I would say good luck with your systems updates, but truth is, I hope your company is someday picked apart piece by piece by the rest of the vultures standing by waiting to watch you die so they can actually offer a service that you so sorely lack at this time and date.

Meanwhile, I'll be waiting for a phone call that actually gets through this time.

Tropical Storm Ida - Another Dud Hits the Gulf Coast

After the storm that "wasn't", I hit the beaches this morning with a little photog time with me, my family in tow, and the man I married's camera; a Canon SX10 IS PowerShot. For a beginning photographer like myself, it's a great camera to use on the fly; easy too!

Is Canon endorsing/paying me big bucks to spin a little commentary on their product?

Oh Hell No!

But, if they ever feel the need to knock on my email door and ask if I'll plug a little diddy for them, name your price baby!

Anyway, here's a few shots of the beach entrance into Ft. Pickens since we couldn't actually get in to Ft. Pickens because the road that was just repaired and opened back up a few months ago, is now covered with a thick layer of sand and surf. It's been closed since Ivan hit back in 2004 and it looks like it's gonna be closed down for awhile again.

Then it was over to Pensacola Beach where CNN was bored of covering a storm that never really was and were in the process of packing up and leaving town when we got there. Those folks are not as exciting in person as you see them on TV. I guess they were tired of standing in the rain all night long covering a blah rain storm. ABC was there too, but I didn't see anyone so I assume they were all asleep in the van. Al Roker must have been in there snoozing too.

Maybe the folks at CNN should have thought to do the same before they showed up in public the morning after.

Oh, I threw in a few shots of the fam enjoying the beach as well. Nia is such a ham in front of the camera, and I swear I should put Toni into modeling after some of the shots I got of her.

Enjoy!

BTW, please check out my neighbor and friends blog, Gulf Breeze Daily Photo, with some additional photo's of the aftermath of Tropical Storm DUD! She and her daughter sure have a great eye.

Some Spooky **late** Stuff

Okay, so I'm a little late on the Halloween thing. No one could ever blame me for being punctual. So I tossed a few photos in a little scrapblog for you here. Just something I'm experimenting with. Let me know what you think.